The thief left it behind: the moon at my window - Ryokan

Sunday, August 31, 2008

A dream


A precious being, 'X', told me a dream he had the other night.

A friend was committing suicide.
He poured petrol over himself and set himself ablaze.
It was a shocking and horrifying experience.
X ran inside to call people and tell them what was happening.
When he returned
...he saw Buddha seated where his friend had been
At that moment he woke.

I found this dream beautiful and meaningful
It spoke to me of the masks of Buddha.

Everyone is a masked Buddha (universal truth)

Life, the great Guru
brings us many many sacred lessons
- they all take the form of the Masked Buddha

We went on to speak about the difficulties life presents.
The great suffering one experiences.
Death of beloveds, financial hardship, loss, loss, loss...

I thought of the shock 'X' experienced in the dream
- seeing his friend in flames
then the awed amazement to find
Buddha sitting amongst the ashes

I thought of that feeling in our hearts and bodies
at the moment of trauma
loss or extreme hardship
- that sharp pain
that sense of 'AAAAH!'

What is the cause of the immense pain?
Is it the holding on to the mask
which will shift in time
if we allow it
to reveal
the Buddha

Pain is...
holding onto the mask

We went on to speak of the ultimate loss we will all experience
- the loss of our own lives.

I thought of the so obvious yet surprising statement
i heard on the radio the other day:
In 90 years
only a handful of all people living today
will still be alive.

Life is our guru
bearing sacred lessons
preparing us for the final letting go

Each painful experience we have
is an opportunity
to prepare for the final letting go

is an opportunity
to practice acceptance
and going with the flow

This morning I was reflecting on X's dream again/still
and I remembered a while back when I became aware
of the umbilical cord
which holds 'us' to this body.
A sense of awareness that there is an 'etheric body' (for want of another term)
connected to this physical body
And I could feel the cord somewhere above the physical navel area,
perhaps in the area of the solar plexus chakra.

- the sense of this cord is an echo or imprint of that 'aaah' we experience
in those very tough moments,
I wandered if this umbilical cord is also the cord
between ego and higher awareness

The physical body, it's emotions, survival instincts
bound up with the ego's sense of mortality, limitations, need to be in control. etc
whereas our higher awareness which we develop/commune with when we are meditating
is boundless, non dual, etc...

I wondered if enlightenment is the cutting of this umbilical cord
in the same way a baby's is cut
to be freed to live independent of the womb
which brought it to earthly existence

This blog has been quite hard to write
in the sense to trying to describe feelings coherently

it always seems to come back to

Acceptance and

Letting Go

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