The thief left it behind: the moon at my window - Ryokan

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Happy Birthday Genie love


Good morning on Giens b-day! All of 48 years old, he’s in bed with a hot cuppa litchi and lemon with a dash of green tea, homemade by his wife and room temperature – due to its being a winter morning - fruit salad. The fruit salad inspired by his dream where oranges featured strongly - the symbolism made me wonder if his body wished for those vitamins. He’s writing a book born today, about a love story - birthed on the internet – LOL guess who! This book seeded by our many discussions and the so many questions and mails we receive from others looking for love and too often not finding it. We so often ponder why so few seem to find love and remain seekers of it, or give up... so that’s the beginnings. Watch this space! Next to him lies the Nepalese meditation cushion and maroon Mala bag decorated with symbols I gave him as a birthday gift. Also the beautiful book by the Dalai Lama lent to him by a friend from our Sangha... the stage is set - the day is beginning...



my daughter, Natalie, emailed Gien
Happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday dear Gien!
Happy birthday to you!

Hip hip hooooooraaaaaaaayyyyyy! Hip hip

Wishing you a wonderful birthday and amazing year!

You are a wonderful addition to the family, thank you for making my
mom so happy.

Love Nats :)


Gien replied
Hi Nats,

I love your mum a great deal
and she loves me in the same way
Our bliss is very natural and spontaneous

In Buddhism there is the idea of compassion or "Bodhicitta"
this means love for all beings
I think this is profoundly important in a relationship
and the actual "secret" to true happiness

For a genuine relationship to flow effortless and free
we must love both the other person AND ourselves in the relationship

We know that the joy we bring our partner
is returned to us many times over
In bringing joy to another
that is the only genuine way that we ourselves can receive the others joy

If we were to take a selfish view instead
and try to GET joy for ourselves from the other
by controlling the other and dictating conditions to the other
that is when it backfires

What we create instead
is an environment for a desire and attachment filled relationship
where the conditions no longer exist for love to flow freely

When we perceive that something is wanted from us
we feel used and objectified
and that closes down our natural propensity to give
How does it feel when someone comes to us
and demands "I want this", "Give me that"?
It doesn't feel right, does it?
There is no sense of gratitude
no expression of appreciation of the other

For this reason
we have the paradox
that the selfish attitude when manifest in relationships
leads to the very failure of the relationship
while the limitless giving to our partner
is what creates the condition
for our partner's limitless giving to us

Many Blessings to you and Jason

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